“You’re too old to have dreams”: 28-year-old woman refuses to babysit sister’s kids to prioritize her dance career, sister belittles her career goals due to her age

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    AITA for refusing to babysit my sister's kids after she told me I was "too old" to have dreams?

    "You're prioritizing stupid dreams over family"
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    I (28F) have always wanted to be a professional dancer. It's been my passion since I was a little girl, and I've trained hard over the years. I understand that it's a tough field with no guaranteed success, but I've managed to land some gigs here and there. I'm not famous, but I'm proud of what I've accomplished and I continue to work towards my goals.
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    My sister (34F) has two kids, ages 5 and 7. She is a great mom, and I admire how dedicated she is to her children. That being said, she often asks me to babysit them, especially when she has events to attend or needs some time for herself. I usually don't mind helping out, but I do have my own commitments and sometimes I just can't.
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    Recently, she asked me to babysit for a whole weekend while she goes to a music festival. I told her that I couldn't because I have an important audition coming up and I need to focus on that. She got really upset and accused me of prioritizing my "stupid dreams" over my family. That's when she said that I was too old to have
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    dreams and that I should just give up on dancing and help her instead.
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    That hurt. A lot. I tried to explain to her that I am not "too old" and that people can achieve their dreams at any age, but she wasn't having it. She called me selfish for not wanting to babysit and put her kids in my place, saying that I should be ashamed of myself. Now, I love my niece and nephew, but I also think that they should learn to respect other people's boundaries.
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    Now, she's telling our parents that I'm a bad aunt and I might ruin their relationship with her kids if I keep refusing to babysit. My parents are somewhat supportive of my dancing career, but I can tell that they think I should help my sister more.
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    AITA for standing up for my dreams and not wanting to babysit?
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    DANCE
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    • Alarming Reply_62... 18h ago Your goals & dreams have nothing to do with your sister's life or her kids. Her kids are her responsibility, if she chooses to be ped off with your choice not to babysit, that's her problem.
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    - NTA you can have dreams & a great relationship with your sister's kids. Both things are possible. What is not possible is your sister telling you what you can or cannot do with your own life.
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    Interesting_You_2315 18h ago NTA. Your plans are more important than her plans. She's not working. She's going to a festival - sometimes parents can't do what they want because they have kids. This is one of those times.
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    Dr... 18h ago • Edited 15h ago absolutely NTA.. she decided to have children therefore they are her responsibility.. She is just mad that she couldnt make you babysit for her fun weekend.. where is the father in all this? why cant his family or your parents
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    babysit? You can love your sisters children to death but do not sacrifice your dreams and time because she wants free time. Moms dont always get free time thats what she signed up for not you.. Your dreams are important and the fact that she even said that
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    Cheezburger Image 10467741696
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    would make me second guess doing anymore favors for her for a while. Let her see how "bad" you could be. Side note :your parents need to stand up and support you a music festival is NOT, I repeat NOT important and they need to teach their daughter to grow up a bit
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    _BigDaddyNate_ • 14h ago Another one of these? Person A has things they do Person B wants them to babysit Person A says that they can't.
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    TheSassiestPanda • 18h ago NTA OP when someone accuses YOU of being selfish because you're not doing something that benefits THEM, it is generally a very clear indicator that they in fact are the one's acting selfishly, not you. Chase your dreams girl!
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    Perimentalpause • 18h ago NTA. "How dare you put your life and experiences above being my backup parent." That's what she's saying. Her needs/wants supersede yours, and I expect she's felt this way her whole life. Whether it's a
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    job, audition, date, or just you want to go kayaking with whales because you feel like it, you are allowed to have plans, you are allowed to have pleasures, and you are allowed to have a life that doesn't revolve around bailing. her out. Not dropping
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    everything doesn't make you a aunt. Her implying it does makes her both a sister and a mom.
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    • Shineybird 11h ago NTA. Tell your sister if she thinks you're selfish for not prioritizing family over your career, she needs to look at herself bc she is prioritizing her having fun over taking care of her kids.
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    Double-Usual750 • 11h ago I don't care if you had planned to wash your a that weekend. It's not her business. She's just mad that she doesn't have her free babysitter so she can go pursue HER passions. Honestly screw her. She
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    sounds terrible and like she forgot to mature beyond the age of 16. You're not mad enough so I'll get mad for you. This was selfish, out of line, and absolutely uncalled for. Tell her you need space and you don't want to hear
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    from her until you reach back out. Show her you're put on this earth to serve her and her children.

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